I've learned.....

I've been thinking about things I've learned in the past 2 years...actually probably longer than that but the past year or two has been at the forefront of my mind. Things change so fast. In the blink of an eye sometimes. In a heartbeat. In a breath. Again I will say that I do not write these things for you...I write them for me. It's very therapeutic for me when I can see my feelings written out. Somehow it doesn't make my life seem so hellish and it helps me deal with it. So if you read this, I appreciate you taking the time and caring. If you don't, well that's okay too...it's not gonna kill me, break my legs or make me ugly. (that's something I always told my kids when they didn't wanna do something I told them to do. LOL)


As many of you know, the past 2 years we've had more than our share of heartaches, illnesses, and losses. We've struggled with what Life has dealt us but yet we've held on to God and each other and we've survived. Well...we're surviving. Doing the best we can with what we've got and trying to make it all worthwhile. But through it all I've learned so much. Yet I know I still have so much more to learn.

Here are some of the things I've learned:


>I've learned that time is short with our loved ones and we must make our time with them as memorable and as loving as we can.

>I've learned that there are things beyond my control and there is NOTHING I can do to change it...no matter how much I want to.

>I've learned that just because you are "family" doesn't mean you can use that as a right to hurt me or say rude, inconsiderate words to me. And it doesn't give me the right to do the same to you.

>I've learned that family and friends won't always be there for me, support my decisions, or help me in my struggles.

>I've learned that just because you don't THINK something will happen, doesn't mean it won't.

>I've learned that strangers can become best friends and best friends can become strangers.

>I've learned that parents often outlive their children.

>I've learned that no matter how hard and stressful my life is, there is always someone who has it worse.

>I've learned that just because I taught my kids about God and taught them right from wrong, they get to the age that they make their own decisions and all I can do is pray for them to make the right ones.

>I've learned that no matter how I want things to turn out...they seldom do.

>I've learned that even when I don't feel like smiling, I can fake it really good.

>I've learned that it's okay to ask for help, even when there is no one there to help me.

>I've learned that money isn't everything...but time is.

>I've learned that there are those who surprise me....some in a good way, some not so much.

>I've learned those I thought would never leave me, did. And those I thought would, didn't.

>I've learned that just because you share the same blood doesn't mean you share the same hopes, dreams, and worries.

>I've learned blood isn't what makes a family. Love is.

>I've learned that it's okay to stay awake all night and sleep all day. It works for me.

>I've learned that it's my life and I'm the one who has to live it. I will stand before God concerning my stuff, not you.

>I've learned that going to church every time the doors are open, doesn't mean I have a free ride to Heaven. It's so much more than that. I've also learned that God loves me regardless if I go to church or not.

>I've learned that I have so much more love, respect and compassion for those who struggle with illnesses, death, and tragedies.

>I've learned that it's okay to say "I'm having a rough day" or "today I'm struggling".

>I've learned that not everyone understands me or my life, or even cares to try to understand. And it's okay.

>I've learned that I expect too much from people and I'm usually disappointed.

>I've learned that when I think I can't go one more day or even one more step, God gives me the strength to go on.

>I've learned that thinking positive may help the attitude but it really doesn't help the physical.

>I've learned that music can heal the soul. So can screaming, crying, writing, and talking.

>I've learned that burying my only son, my firstborn, my child was the hardest thing I've ever had to do.

>I've learned that there are times that we cannot protect our children...no matter how hard we try.

>I've learned that things can change so fast....and other things change over time.

>I've learned that no matter how much you want things to be different, sometimes it doesn't work that way.

>I've learned that we all have a cross to bear and most times we have to bear it alone.

>I've learned that a hug can cure the "blues".

>I've learned that a beautiful day can be sunny or rainy...depends on what you find beautiful about it.

>I've learned to appreciate nature and I can see God's hand in it.

>I've learned that 50 is not old....neither is 80.

>I've learned that it's okay to not clean house every day or to leave the dishes for the next meal. Spending time with my loved ones is more important.

>I've learned the value of a dollar, a quarter, a dime, a nickel or even a penny.

>I've learned it's okay to not clean out Luc's closet. I can still go in there and smell him on his clothes.

>I've learned that grief is not something you can just "get over" like the flu. And it's okay to still be feeling the "effects" even after a year or two...or even 14.

>I've learned to realize how many "firsts" there are without him. First holiday, first birthday, first football game, first camping trip, first vacation. As my friend Sarah says, "we are a family of 5 minus 1". Of course, the numbers have changed because of grandkids but we're still "minus 1".

>I've learned that being a little overweight is okay....as long as I am happy and my husband still thinks I'm gorgeous.

>I've learned that fighting for something even when I'm tired is better than giving up.

>I've learned that photographs say so much even when you don't want to see/hear what they are saying.

>I've learned that everyone has different opinions and it's okay. We don't all have to agree.

>I've learned that sometimes saying nothing is for the best....but sometimes saying nothing can be hurtful.

>I've learned that sarcasm and sincerity are two things that can be misunderstood when typed, texted, or written.

>I've learned that I am a strong woman.....even when I don't feel so strong.

>I've learned that it's the little things that have become more important to me. A smile, a hug, a cold Coca-Cola, a Hershey bar, a note from a friend, a text, a funny story.

>I've learned that some people lie, cheat, steal......doesn't mean I have to.

>I've learned that just because I pray about something doesn't mean that it'll be enough to change the situation...but I still pray.

>I've learned that Life is hard. It's sad. It's painful. It's stressful. It's lonely. But it can also be beautiful.

>I've learned that no matter how much I make sure my family is taken care of, sometimes I fail. I do what I can and sometimes it's not enough. Doesn't mean I should stop "doing".

>I've learned that sometimes a cure is not meant for us....that's okay. As long as we keep God first and foremost then we will make it.


There is so much more stuff I've learned. I'm still learning things every day. The main thing I've learned is that Wade, Lezly, Linsy, Brexton, Braylee, and myself are a team. And as long as we stick together, we can get through anything....the ups, the downs, the rough patches, the happy times. As individuals we are weak but as a team we are strong. We inspire each other. We support each other. We listen, we talk, we cry, we encourage, we pray....for each other, with each other.


I thank you, Lord, for my family and for my friends.....I am truly blessed. Thank you for my strength, Lord...for I could not do this alone. Thank you for standing beside me, for loving me, for showing me Your Grace and Mercy! Amen